Truck full of Letters.

Mkay Bitch let Me get some things straight. You know whats fucking annoying hayley? Seeing All your pictures on my newfeed. mkay. We get your soo gorgeous and the most prettiest chick in school wait let me change that. in america. But god damn who the fuck takes 3945879347593475 pictures of themselves every fucking day. Its so fucking annoying. likes whos that obessed with themselves? and its more annoying how your always like god i hate myself sooo much. really bitch? cause it doasnt seem like that since you always take all these damn pictures of yourself. And how you always talk about how every guys obessed with you. Im pretty sure not everyone is soooo obessed with you. You know there diffrence bettween someone saying your pretty to stocker. mkay. And also stop trying to act like your some ghetto top pretty bitch like wtf? HAHAHAH its so fucking funny seeing you trying to act like you have such a body. You have the body of a 5th grader. The only reason why it looks like you have boobs is cause you wear 2 bras? and you wear like so many push up. stop trying to act like your something that your not. And stop bragging about how popular you are. Theres nothing wrong with you. You just try to act so depressed and shit. When you have like everything. so just SHUTUP. oh and thanks for talking to trey. After i told you i liked. Your such a nice chick. please leave me alone. I just hang with you cause im bored.

Jul 05

I Don’t really have a dramatic story that made me like this. It just Sorta Happen I guess. I got Tired of people and Societys standards.To be honest It’s hard to love myself when you see someone better than you. Its Hard to be Happy cause There’s always someone who ruins it. I’m not trying to be depressed really I’m trying my hardest to become better But how can I when There are people or society just constantly putting you down.

Jul 02

I feel Very ashamed To Look at myself in the mirror constantly. And care so much what people think. I wish I didnt. I wish I wouldnt be so jealous when I see a friend look so pretty and get so many guys. You know? I have This friend Named Hayley And she is so gorgeous. I think were equally but you know everyone acts like shes way more prettier and shes sooo popular. And you know what sad? Is that The reason she is and gets all this attention Is cause She shows her self off. Like gives off the image that shes a whore. Like no offence but in her pictures she kinda looks like one okay. Im sorry but she does. I understand Having one bikini Picture of yourself? okay but like having fucking 6 okay everyone understand You have aperfect body and your boobs grew alot and You have a big ass and to top it all of You have Such an amazing face. But she takes so many god damn pictures of herself its sooooooooo fucking annoying. Like thats the one thing I dont like. Im glad So Many people think shes beautiful and Every Guy wants To bang Her but serisoly You dont have to take 4 eeryday We get it Okai. How the Fuck does No one else feel this way. I feel like its just me that thinks that. Like wed be bestfriend to extreme cause shes amazing and we get along but seriusoly Its hard Not to get jealous and have such a low selfesteem and care so much what people think when im around who constantly brings it up.

Concerns about after life and god.

Okay So If I had to describe My life From When i was born to This very Instand Id have to be completley honest I missed out on alot. But to Be postive for like once there was some good memories. You know I constantley think about What if i die tomrrrow did i live my life to the fullest am i? You know I sometimes think Whats going to happen After life. Where will I be. Cause to be honest I Dont completley Trust that God Is there. Theres Time were I like to Hope. Times where I think its just me. And Times where I Know hes there. I just dont know. I think thats truley how I feel about everything. I Don’t know How High School will turn out. I dont know Who My friends are going to. I dont know If in like 5 years ill be some druggie who pregant. I dont know. I dont even know I today could be my last day. Sometimes What I think scares me. Like well alot of shit happen to me I dont belive in God? Its hard to when theres like alot sorts of stuff that contradict what the bible says.And Especially when i cant even feel comfterable around his people.

Mar 20

This is reality.

I can’t ever please you no matter how hard i try. I can never, never please you. Can you just be happy with me for once or at least try? Im trying my hardest and you dont understand that. You assume so much. And honestly you dont know me. You dont know me so just stop acting like you do. Cause YOU DONT. You know nothing about me. Do you know what i go threw in my head or just anywhere. You always assume shit just stop for once. You dont know me like my close friends do. Just stop acting like you know please get that in your head. Stop judging me just please just stop. Stop acting like im always wrong your so hypocritcal you say that I always blame you oh my fucking god You give me shit all the fucking time and you dont even realize it. You got so bitter threw all the years and you keep getting worse. I hope you know that. Arguing every fucking day with mother is not only making you worse but its making our whole family worse. Were all getting worse everyday. You know why im out so much? Its cause this house is soo damn depressing. The atmosphere just makes me automatically more deppressed. literally when i walk in the house im just so dammn sad. Im already depressed but you dont give a shit and it so obvious so lets move on. You know why i lie to you so much? Cause you get mad over every small thing so i get scared youll get mad and i want to please you.. BUT NO ONE CAN EVER FUCKING PLEASE YOU. Your turning out like my mother everyday. worse and worse. your gonna be jus like her. I know the truth hurts but im sorry I just have to say it. You can only hold in something for so long. Stop trying to push me into something i dont want to be. Your making me worse everytime you do that. You dont realize that. I hope someday when were older youll learn to do that. Im not a bad Kid I know you grew up in a strict enviorment. But Serisoly please just stop contraling my life. If you trusted me we would have a better relationship but since you dont. Are relationship sucks between the two of us. You are not me. You get that? You dont know what i go threw.how can i respect someone who doasnt treat me right? You scream at me, curse and spit in my face like you have no damn respect for me. Now tell me how can i respect you? Have you ever even tried to get to know me? no really have you. You never ask how my day is, how i feel I wish you could do that for me. What if i had just such a terrible day and i just was at the verge taking pills and you just scream at my face some more? What would happen? I would serisoly do it. Ive done it before what would stop me from doing it again ? Its those times where i wish i had my dad. I really do. I wish i got to know him cause sometimes i feel like alot missing inside of me. I feel so sadd. You dont know even have a clue. Of course you’ll think Im just doing everything for attention. Oh she just wants attention just some hormones and all that shit. I wont take her serious cause shes only thirteen shes not going threw that bad of shit. You tell mother this all the time? Stop focusing on the negative side. Why dont you stop too? Why dont you ever notice when im trying my hardest to please you. Just one day im gonna run away from all of this. Itll all be gone. You wont have to yell at me anymore. And tell me everything i do wrong. Youll save your breathe for something else. Cause obviouisly I cant ever please you and your not happy with me. Maybe this familys better of without me. Screaming at me more and being as strict as you can be will not make me better.Why do you want me to be scared of you..like What do you get out of that.. Watever happend to having a close bond with your child you know ive always wanted that. I wish i had parent like that That i trusted and could tell anything too and id be comfterable around and just say what i feel and itll be okay and itll give me advice and everything. And wed go out and bond. Like idk that kinda why i wish my dad was alive cause maybe he was like that. You were raised diffrently you know. But at least something good comes out of this. When im older im gonna be nothing like you. Im gonna make sure my child feels love. Ill displine but not too extremes ill trust her and well have a good relationship. Ill make sure my child can tell me anything without her being afraid of what ill say. Theres a diffrence of being scared of someone and respecting someone. Youll get respect if you treat someone the way you want to be treated. Dont ever forget that. There shouldnt be a “boss” or win or loose. No war Just peace. You see me as what you want to see me.